What the Heck?!
I am not sure what has happened to my life, but when I read my Peacocks blog and I compare it to what life is like now, I feel like I really may have been sucked into some Twilight Zone vortex. Seriously.
I was at Costco this morning and I think it must have been Senior Discount Day or something because EVERYONE there was a geriatric and moving along at a snail's pace. Now I don't want to sound like some callous, evil bitch. I love the elderly, adore my only living grandparent, and respect them to no end.....but when you have a 3 year old and a 7 month old in tow and need to race through the warehouse, stand in a line that wraps around the candy section three times, check out and make it home before my baby girl has to take a nap and my son needs his lunch.....literally moving a step every three minutes just doesn't work.
And while my bambini made it out of the store without any major meltdowns, I almost had a tantrum of my own as I waited in yet another line to exit the store...you know, that line where someone marks off your receipt just to make sure you aren't trying to steal the Charmin 54 roll dual ply toilet paper mega pack or a Sauder bedroom set. Yeah, I almost lost it as an ancient couple repeatedly rammed me in the ass as I was waiting in line to escape the store. EVERY freakin' step I took WHAM! cart in my rear....WTF?! I even looked back AND made eye contact with them to no avail. I think I may have a grate print bruise on my hindquarters from that one.....have mercy.







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