Welcome to my uterus.

There will be a disclaimer at the end.

Yesterday something disturbing happened to me. The worst part is, it wasn't the first time. Yesterday morning, at the bus stop, a neighbor lamented over the fact that all our kids were growing up on this side of the city. So they said to me, "You need to have another."

I've come to expect it, but not exactly accept it. Most of the people in my little city are Catholic, and the intricacies of vasectomies may puzzle them, but it's still a little creepy to have someone who you know on a "waving basis" invite themselves into your reproductive life. If you want to follow it through to it's natural conclusion, they are really wanting me to have sex. I'm flattered that other people pay that much attention to my sex life, but really, STOP.

Since I haven't yet come up with a graceful way of extricating myself from that kind of comment, I usually say, "NO!" a little too loudly. And then I can tell that they are always wondering why I had kids in the first place if I am so against them. lol I'm not against kids. I happen to favor my own more than other people's, but I think that's normal. It's also not to say that if an oopsie happened, we wouldn't love that child just as much. But my family is complete, thank you for asking.

I never envisioned myself having kids in the first place. Not too long before I got married, I began to change my views. I thought that maybe I would want one or two, but never a house full of children. Even before we knew we were having a second one, we kept saying to each other, "Ok. One more, and then we're done." Going through the pregnancies REALLY confirmed it for me. Two was the most I would ever have. I have morning sickness that lasts the entire time, sky-high blood pressure, and babies the size of linebackers. There was nothing pleasant or happy about my pregnancies. And that was the pleasant stuff. Post-delivery of my first, I almost died. I honestly think my brain forgot all of the details, because it was trying to protect itself from the horrors of it.

But it still puzzles me why anyone other than my family thinks they get a say. Is it small talk? If so, would they say the same thing to my mother-in-law who had 8 miscarriages and one stillborn baby before she managed to keep one? It's kinda personal for a reason. Maybe it's my age. Many women are having kids at into their forties, and maybe this made people think that they should reproduce as long as they can. I don't know. Even my kids don't really get a say in the matter. Otherwise, my daughter wouldn't be here. Let's just say that big brother was fond of being an only child. Even the doctor that did my husband's vasectomy felt the need to comment on his young age. Well, I say that it's all the better. My husband knows when it's right for him to stop.

*Now for the disclaimer. I really debated whether I should post this or not. I mean, I think I keep looking around these boards and I can't help thinking, "Oh crap. I'm next in line!" lol The reason I decided to go ahead and post it is for two reasons. A) It's really been on my mind recently. It has begun happening more and more often, and I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do about it. Should I answer, "Yeah, I'll get right on that"? B) NONE of the women here have done this, so I don't have a beef with you. Thank you very much for not doing it. I REALLY, truly mean it when I say that I am happy for all of you. That doesn't mean I'm happy enough to think it's right for me. I hope you can understand what I mean and the sincerity of it.