I've been reading the posts lately of my friend Babette, and something she keeps writing has stuck in my mind, basically this line she keeps writing about being a "good girl".

It's an interesting topic to talk about, because one wonders just how folks make determinations as to good and bad when the lines might be a bit blurry.

It's easy to know when something is really bad. That situation last week in Virginia was bad. This week here, some nutcase shot 3 cops in my area, killed one of them, and then got himself burned up in a house last night that didn't belong to him; he wasn't even near his own home. We know rape is bad, murder is bad, kicking cats and dogs is bad.

It's easy to know when something is really good. We know cute babies, puppies and kittens are good. We know our favorite foods taste good, whether they're good for our bodies or not. We know treating ourselves and others with respect is good, as well as honoring those who deserve to be honored for whatever reason.

But we have those things that are in the middle, those things that we can't agree on across the board, that makes us wonder. For instance, I have never cursed, drank, smoked, taken any drugs, or had a one night stand. At the same time, I have gone for massages and allowed myself the benefit of the "happy ending". Now, do any of these acts make me good or bad?

I've always been fairly good natured, but I had a quick temper when I was younger. I never hit anyone first, but knew how to get them to take a swing at me so I could hit them. I would hit them multiple times until they fell to the ground, then I would just turn and walk away. So, I never really beat anyone up, but I would hit them, then "humiliate" them instead of kicking and stomping them into submission. Was I a good guy or a bad guy?

To me, it's hard to castigate anyone for certain behaviors at certain times of their lives if we don't know what was going on in those lives at the time. Yeah, we might have aversions here and there to certain things, but I don't know that it makes those people necessarily bad, if some other acts might make us think they're good. For instance, if someone took cocaine for 3 years in their 20's, yet gave their free time working with homeless people, are they good or bad? And, now that they're in their 40's, don't take drugs anymore but instead goes to work, comes home, and doesn't volunteer for anything anymore, are they good or bad? Does the criteria really fit in either case, since they were really only doing to themselves, so to speak?

There's a lot of freaky behavior in today's world. Then there's some behavior that's borderline. I was telling a friend of mine about the colorful bracelets that young girls wear, and about not only the "rainbow club", but also the status each of these colored bracelets mean in some other schools across the country. Her response was shock, as her daughter is getting close to that age. She thought that was terrible. Now, would we think these are all "bad" girls because they partake of this behavior in kind of a "gang" or clique situation, or are they "good" girls who don't know some of the possible ramifications of their actions?

Just another mental challenge for the evening; yeah, I know, IOAW will be mad at me again. :-)