HORMONE, n. Miracle of modern science that is, by ingestion or injection, the source of all present-day individual athletic records. As if the naturally-occurring molecules didn’t already cause trouble enough.
- All hail hormones! Lead me astray,
Write me a romance and waft me away.
Dip in the bottle and conjure a member
Fell beyond hope – or did the pretender
Peddle the product with profit in view,
Blithely omitting the odorous stew
That one who indulges can find himself in,
Thinking by magic to augment his sin,
Only to find that the total amounts
To side-effect treatments on doctors’ accounts –
And meanwhile the one who has spawned these desires
Has run off with the dustman. All this inspires
A cold-shower dousing of dreams of this sort,
And to the pill pushers a short sharp retort.
- - Baritone Bondi
- O Ceallaigh
Copyright © 2006 Felloffatruck Publications. All wrongs deplored.







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