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The New Millennium Devil's Dictionary - Romance #6 (with a touch of Religion)

o ceallaigh's picture

FAITH, n. The beautiful, engaging and willing young woman who is falling into your arms when the alarm clock goes off. HAVE FAITH: Not bloody likely on your salary, mate.

VALENTINE, n. False advertising. Enrichment scheme for purveyors of flowers, crepe paper, and cheap sweets to those who should know better.

    I got a rock. - Charlie Brown

VD, acronym. Venereal Disease. Obsolete, replaced by STD (Sexually Transmitted Disease). Also Valentine’s Day, regrettably not obsolete. The pun was delicious, but was probably objected to by the illiterate, and by the sellers and accountants who depend on the illiteracy of others for their bread and cheese. On the other hand, STD might be confused with STP, a lubricant. There is hope.

  - O Ceallaigh

Copyright © 2006 Felloffatruck Publications. All wrongs deplored.

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missmaster's picture

Amused me..

.. as usual! I should save these for times when I need cheering up a little!! Keep up the good work. Smile

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o ceallaigh's picture

re: amused

Thanks. Much appreciated. As for saving them up, well, there's always the archive. Smile If I can clone you about a million times, who knows, there might even be a book deal. ha ha.

Qapla'.

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