You see, I am a 21 year old, jobless lesbian living with her partner and her parents. I don't choose to be like this, in fact, I fucking hate it! The 21 year old bit is ok, except I don't drink and I quit smoking about 2 and a half years ago... so there's no chance of me dieing of lung cancer or kidney failure just yet... Being un-employed is definately not my choice, no sir-ee! I live in a town (not city, unfortunately...town!) where there is, last time I checked, a 7.3% rate of un-employment in this... 'town'. So I've got little chance of getting work here... and then there's being a lesbian.
I've known since I was about eight or nine, that I was gay. It wasn't something that I ever dreamed I would admit to... I mean, who wants to be classed as an 'outsider'? 'not normal'? 'weird'? I was 18 and tried to force myself to like guys and then I got in to a sticky situation and realised that guys were DEFINATELY not for me.
I did as all newly outed gays or lesbians do... signed up to a gay matchmaker website to find someone! I mean, i wasn't gonna throw myself out there in PUBLIC and possibly humiliate myself by asking a girl what her number was only to be yelled at, run away-d from or called "DYKE!". No... a gay dating site is MUCH safer.
So there I was, adding details in to my profile at around midnight, in the dark and hoping my parents wouldn't come in and check on me. "About me"... what the hell do I write here?? "Hi, i'm a new lesbian and just found out. I'm looking for someone who has hair and isn't scary and isn't looking for someone to mother a child"... no. I don't remember my exact wording, but it was something cliche'd like "Hi! I'm fun, friendly, outgoing, likes a drink and a smoke, looking for like-minded individual". How boring.
I almost gave up looking when late one night I thought i'd check on my profile. I hadn't checked it for maybe 3 weeks! And there she was. My partner. Well, i didn't know it then. Let's just call her...... Jane. Jane had messaged me and gave me her number because she was rarely on the internet. I messaged her straight away. I think out of excitement... or curiosity?
"Hi! I'm Val. You messaged me on Gaydar... How are you?". Little did I realise that it was about 2.30AM and she was 2 hours away from waking up to go to work. I'd later find out that Jane worked in a factory with very early starts compared to my food outlet opening times of 11AM. I recieved a reply from her and we agreed to meet the next weekend.
As they say, the rest is history....
We're still together 3 years on. We've had our ups and downs... haven't we all? The trouble is now, that we're both looking for work, both looking for a flat/house to live in to get away from my parents and also trying to battle through constant itchy nags of health problems. WHY is there ALWAYS something else?
I guess life is just always full of surprises and I intend on keeping track of life's little surprises in form of a blog.
Sigh... is life easier for straight people?? Is it?!