CONSPIRACY, n. Fantasy advanced to explain noteworthy events when the facts are too straightforward and boring to sell much advertising.

A businessman stumbled and fell.
      Well?
His hammered head rang like a bell.
      Well?
A report the police did compel.
      Well?
The Editor said “This is swell,
      Well?
I need to know how come he fell.�
      Well?
“He ran for a taxi pell mell,
      Well?
The hole was as deep as a dell.�
      Well?
“What made the hole? Pray do tell.�
      Well?
“The weather. You know that it’s hell.�
      Well?
“It’s neglect! Of this I will yell!
      Well?
“Cry ‘crime!’ and the papers will sell!�
      Well?

No profit arises by chance, do you see,
It’s all from a great vast conspiracy.

- Woodstein Bernward

  - O Ceallaigh

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