Ramblings on work and motherhood

So here I am watching the last few days of maternity leave fly by wondering to myself why did I stop liking my job? Is it because I would do anything to stay with my little boy longer? Is it because I have been there so long and there's no more room to grow? Is it because everyone that works there seems to feel as frustrated as I do..
But then I tell myself to suck it up because you have to go back to work. We have spent all of our savings and maxed out a credit card in 12 weeks.
I decided a few weeks ago that since I had to go back to work I would find a job with more potential for growth and earnings. So I got called for one interview after applying to about 1 million companies. It was located an hour away (with out traffic). Interviews are 50 times worse than blind dates and even worse when you are late because of traffic and getting lost.
I thought the interview went well and had a good feeling when I left. I had convinced my self that a 2 hour commute each way wouldn't be that bad. Clearly I was blinded and not thinking clearly because of the salary the position offered.
That night I talked it over with the husband, and he's great, and said he would support my decision if that's what I wanted to do,but to please keep in mind how hard it will be on all of us.
My job offers all the flexibility that a working mom of 3 needs.
I can work at home a few days a week, I can take a day off with out question, great benefits and pays decently (although I have reached my cap).
My moms advice was "moneys not everything", but right now when we don't have any it sure feels like it. Then my very close friends called and I could tell she wanted to say something but was unsure if she could. But she did and she did for about 10 minutes straight. She has 3 kids all college age and she described all the reasons why she wishes she hadn't worked so hard while they were so young. She said she worked so hard for money so her family could be comfortable, so the kids could have what they want and now they're grown, they s till don't seem to have much money and she missed out on a lot of their childhoods.
By that point I was crying, probably because of leftover pregnancy hormones or maybe just knowing that she was right. She was right that I would miss too much and that money isn't worth that.
The next day I received at automated email notifying me that I didn't get the job....well good.
I'll go back to work in a few days and maybe feel a little better about being in a dead end job, knowing that it's best for my family for now.