Elpidio's picture

Patterns of distorted thinking (5). Is unhappiness the result of external circumstances?

personal values | Psychology | self improvement

Another pattern of distorted thoughts causing a lot of anxiety is the idea that unhappiness and misery is the result of events and external circumstances on which we don't have control.

In fact, 99% of our misery is not caused by the unpleasant situations in our environment, but rather it is created internally by our reaction to those unpleasant situations.

To a certain extent we have control on the world that surrounds us, but on the internal world we can have total control. Most of the times people exaggerate the meaning and the importance of the negative circumstances, or concentrate too much in them, creating what is called an overreaction.

We should wonder: “Will this subject for which am worrying now, be important five or ten years from now?" If it is important we should worry, but if it’s not perhaps we are dedicating too much time and concern to that which is not anything important. If the answer is affirmative, I can recognize that I am free to choose and to decide the best way of facing the problem, but in complete control of my emotional states.

When we are emotionally involved in a problem, it will be difficult to be objective and realistic. We need to evaluate ourselves free of passions and subjective pansies, to be able to see us acting in the drama of life.

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pchan33's picture

locus of control

I thoroughly enjoyed this article.

Dreams Matter.

http://www.associatedcontent.com/user/6562/pchan_stockton.html

Elpidio's picture

Unhappiness as a result of external circumstances

Thanks for your comment. I do really think that Dreams Matter !

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