My truck is just gonna get better and better!

Trucks. Such beautiful things. Great enablers. There's nothing more wonderful than being able to jump in your truck and head off out into the sunset, ploughing your own unique furrow. Down Highway 61! Down the M5! Down Autobahn Nummber Zwei! What could be more exciting? Nothing, I assure you. And it was with a shit-load of excitement that I discovered a website that has everything I could ever need to accessorize my little trucky-wucky ... and my SUV, my van and even my automobile. My plain old automobile. It's not as invigorating and mind-expanding to move about in a car as it is a truck, that's for sure, but it serves a purpose -- true, that purpose is not much more than getting from A to B, and my truck'll do that too, but in so much more style.

You see, I love trucks. There's nothing more I can say about that. I'm addicted to them. So many memories of trucking. So many great memories. I recall one occasion when, with a good friend of mine named Billy (though we called him Hog), I drove all night, all morning, all afternoon, all night, all morning, all afternoon, all night and then all day and then all night and then all to reach San Jose for a vomit convention. You're probably thinking, what the heck is a vomit convention? Well, it's a big room full of a load of guys (and some gals) puking their guts out. Like everything in life, some are better at it than others. I always say it's the taking part that counts. Anyway, that was why I drove all day and all night for three days -- because I wanted to get really, really nauseated. Billy was a little PO'ed that I'd hogged all the driving, but he sure got over it quickly when we hit SJ -- besides, he was an old time master at the old finger down the throat technique (he improved on the power of his fingers with a ten minute encounter with a homeless guy's asshole -- damn, that boy was crazier than a hog on ice). We had all the vomit we could take. We were like pigs in S.H.I.T. Damn! That was a great experience. The truck tonneau cover got sticky, but, man, that was one hell of a trip! Look it up the next time you're in SJ -- they run them bi-annually. The Vomit Club, those are the guys in charge. I'm a gold member. So's Billy.

So this site I found. It's a beautiful thing. I can get every accessory every from these guys. Literally everything. Cotton wool for my torsion bars (don't want to kill any wheel-chair users or raccoons), towing shit, cargo shit, all the interior dice I could ever need -- I mean, I really like dice. I wondered if they have those stickers too -- you know, the "How's my driving, call 1800 EAT MY NUGGETS" kind -- but I couldn'r find any. That was a disappointment, but the rest of the site and all the shit they're selling is fucking A!