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MTV did a terrible job of setting up the last episode of 'The Hills". In the preview, they showed Lauren listening to a message from Jason Wahler, her ex-boyfriend. So of course we all thought that the "call" would be a major part of this week's episode. Well, guess what? It's not. In fact, all they do is replay the same exact scene from the preview. Really. And it doesn't even come till the very end of the show.

So you probably want to know a little bit of what happens before the big "call", right? The show opens with Lauren and Heidi discussing what Heidi should wear for her first day of work. This time she actually chooses a cute work outfit, which is rather shocking considering that she wore jeans to her interview.

Next we see Lauren, hard at work at Teen Vogue. Well maybe not hard at work, I mean she's just moving clothes from one rack to another, but still. Suddenly she gets a phone call. So she picks up the phone and says.... "Hello?". That's right, she answers her WORK phone with "Hello?" Whatever. Maybe that's just how it's done in the magazine industry.

Anyway, it's Blaine and he asks Lauren to come see him. One thing about Blaine... I think I read somewhere on the internet that he's a freelance writer... and it's highly unlikely that a freelance writer for the magazine would have their own "office". But I guess I can understand why MTV picked him for "The Hills". Blaione is one of those guys that isn't part of management, but yet he pretends like he is... you know, the guy that wants you to think he's in "good" with the higher-ups while the rest of the office makes fun of him behind his back. That's Blaine. Although, I have to admit he's the most interesting male "character" on the show thus far.

So he tells Lauren that she's being sent to NYC to deliver a dress to the almighty Lisa Love. He doesn't know how long she'll be there, it could be a day or five days, although I think he secretly knows it's just an in and out job. So then he says "Go, get out of here." and Lauren runs out. Throughout the entire conversation, all that Lauren can say is "OK"... it's hilarious...

Next we skip on over to Quixote, where Audrina works and we see that Brian (or Retard #2 as I like to call him) has come for an "impromptu" surprise visit. Ok, first of all - Audrina is supposedly the receptionist at Quixote. Yet, when Brian comes in, she jumps up and the first thing she does is offer to show him around. Nevermind that the receptionists job is to answer phones and greet visitors, both of which involve staying at your desk. But of course, who wants to see that when they can see a Maxim shoot in progress instead, right? I love reality TV. After the tour Brian asks Audrina out and she says, "Yes."

Meanwhile, back at the Hillside Villas Heidi is sitting in her living room... reading. A book. Yes, you read that right. I don't know which book she's reading, I'm sure it's one that an MTV set designer placed in their apartment, but whatever. I mean, what other book would she be reading -- she's not in school anymore, right? So, Lauren quickly fills Heidi in and the two begin to look for Lauren's pink suitcase and pick out designer clothes for Lauren to take on her New York trip.

After Lauren leaves, Heidi heads out to the pool (now this is more like it) with Audrina to discuss things like dropping out of school and getting into clubs, because we all know those two things go hand in hand.

On to Heidi's first day of work... Brent has a quick meeting with Heidi basically telling her "The way we work is sink or swim." Then he gives Heidi her first assignment -- stuffing envelopes in the mailroom. Heidi halfheartedly tries to have a conversation with an intern there, but you can see she's thinking -- "Um, when does the party start?" Poor Heidi.

Heidi isn't the only one having a bad day though. Across the country, Lauren lands in New York and rushes over to deliver the dress to Lisa Love. The exchange takes all of 10 seconds, with Lisa barely acknowledging Lauren and telling her she has to get right back on the plane and go back to LA. Awww... maybe Lisa didn't like Lauren's outfit. It kind of looked like an 8th graders graduation dress... from like 1990.

While Lauren is in the car contemplating her "The Devil Wears Prada" moment - complete with Anna Wintour - Heidi calls to complain about how boring her job is. As the two girls exchange job horror stories, I wonder if this is the moment they'll realize that work is work... and not all glamour. Nah...

At the end of Heidi's first day at work, she asks Landon (Brent's 1st assistant) for a quick minute with Brent. Landon gives her a weird look, but motions her back to his office. So next we see Heidi sitting on the couch with some weird Morticia-looking lady and of course Brent sitting at this desk. Heidi tells them that she didn't realize that she would be "working full-time" or "stuffing envelopes" and she thought she thought there would be "events" (i.e. parties). So Morticia tells her that if she wants to be involved in the nightclub aspect she has to "crawl before she walks" and Brent tells her that "this is what the job is". In the end, Heidi has no choice but to accept the fact that she isn't going to be Lizzie Grubman overnight and she tells Landon "See you tomorrow" on the way out.

That night, Brian and Audrina go out on their date and it is booooring. They eat at some restaurant called "Gyu-Kaku" and I swear the most interesting part of the whole scene is the waiter. He tells Brian that "only women" order the Green Apple Soshu and Brian still orders it.
After their date, they go back to Audrina's apartment, where she invites him in to "hang out" for a little bit.

The next morning, Heidi is eating breakfast in bed with her boyfriend, Retard #1, laying next to her. He tries to convince her to lay in bed all day (how ambitious) and even goes as far as to say "Quit". But of course being the career-driven women that Heidi is, she heads off to work anyway.

At Bolthouse, Heidi is in a little staff meeting where Brian gives her the job of doing travel for three Bolthouse employees, including himself. I really wish that they would've shown Heidi trying to figure out how to do this... because remember, up to this point all we've seen her do is lick envelopes. Ooooh, but the best part comes at the end of the meeting when Brent asks Heidi to get him a sandwich. I'm sure that Heidi has probably never fetched a sandwich for anybody in her entire life. I laughed and felt sorry for her... but really what do you expect when you're somebodys 2nd assistant?

Back at the Hillside Villas, Lauren arrives back home from her cross-country trip and listens to the "unexpected call" that MTV hyped up so much. It's nothing more than Jason asking Lauren if she wants to hang out and catch up now that they're both in LA. Lauren gives the answering machine a "What?" look and then heads off to her room to unpack.

At the end of the show we see Lauren staring out the window (and probaby thinking of Jason) during class, while Heidi enters her work schedule into her calendar. I'm assuming this is so she won't forget to come to work, but I could be wrong.

So the previews for next weeks episode show Lauren getting a HUGE floral arrangement from Jason... and of course going out on a date with him. Yes MTV, we'll pretend that we're on the edge of our seats in anticipation as to whether Lauren and Jason will get back together - while back in the real world (thanks to the tabloids) we know that they're a couple... again.

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