Happy Easter DAMN IT! and "Henchmen"

Happy Easter Damn It! By the way, why do they call it an Easter Egg Hunt? Shouldn't it be an Easter Egg
Search? It's not like your shooting at the eggs or
they're running from you. Life has been good to me lately.

I got cast in another movie called "Henchmen"

. It's a cross between "Reservoir Dogs" and "Clerks". I might be playing a Senator, but the Executive Producer said he might want to use me for another part. Besides, I'm still a little young to play a Senator. Of course, if I get the Senator role I will have to announce my candidacy for the Presidency.

My PT job at the Country Club is going well. The
staff is excellent and they have some well known
members. I spoke with Lance Armstrong (Yes, the 7 time Tour de France champion) the other day. At
least, he was riding his bike this time. I've seen
him at the Convention Center/Palmer Auditorium before
and he drove those times. I've also guarded his
Auction items for the Lance Armstrong Foundation at
the Convention Center. If I just had one of his items
for an Ebay Auction, I wouldn't have to work for a
couple of years.

In my opinion, The Tour de France is really over rated.
I raced Lance home and smoked his ass. He really
needs to turn over the title. I'm the real deal. I
ride my bike everywhere. You won't see me in a classy
BMW or Suburban like that JABRONI!

My gay movie role started shooting (shooting film you
IDIOTS! not fluids) this week and it's been a blast so
far. On the first day of shooting, it only took me
2hrs to realize my Cowboy Hat was on backwards. I was
born in Massachusetts and lived there for 10 years so
I have an excuse.

On a sour note, my gay acting career has been hit by
a major setback. I was just about to sign a deal
worth millions to be in "Broke Back Mountain II"

when somehow this friggin Paparazzi Photographer gets a picture of me snorting cocaine off a stripper in a motel off of IH 35. When I find out who OUTED ME AS STRAIGHT and ruined my Major Gay Actor Typecast Career, SOME HEADS WILL ROLL!!! I know it was one of you who just couldn't handle the fact that I was becoming a HUGE GAY STAR and you're not.

THE TOTAL MAN PACKAGE!!! WOOOOOOOO!!!!!