*These statements are only the views of one-me and may not represent all disabled people*

I am disabled and have been for all of my life but that in no way means I am or like being dependent on others for my support and survival. I have always tried to do something on my own before even attempting to ask others to help me, and then I find it hard to do. Even opening a can manually frustrates me because I can't do it. And in most cases i would order out or go without if i were alone.

So when I got old enough and became eligable for government assistance, I thought why not maybe they can help me get on my feet or show me ways to do it. Wrong.

I have learned everyone has their own views on what independence and survival are. For us those with disabilities) it's making it on our own and taking pride in knowing we can do it. We can earn that living, pay that bill or just get from place to place. And we all have different likes, dislikes, skills and abilities. And its up to those put in charge to help us find what works for us and help us get there. Or thats what I thought.

And I do understand there are a few who want others to "take care of them so they dont have to do it themselves" And for them thats fine. But I want to be able to know I can take care of myself and dont have to ask for help. I also like helping others be independent and learn to do something on their own. There is no greater feeling. But unfortunately for some its all about the dollar.

Ever since I can remember, I have liked working, not just to earn that living, but to show I can be a vital part of society. And that makes me feel good.

And each state is different. In NV I had no problem getting government aide because I could not hold a job because of my disability. Now in another state I have to jump through hoops. And I refuse to do that.

Looking at me and looking at my job history you can see that I have not kept a job for longer then a few months. In fact the only job I did have and did enjoy was for a security company. And that job was sitting at a comand post monitoring traffic, phones and radios. I left that one because I didnt see me going any farther, but the job after that I was only at two months maybe because my ex was transfered. (thats another reason my job history isnt all that put together),I do have marketable skills its just finding someone to take a chance ad see what a hard worker I can be when given the chance.

Since in this state I currently live in I have not had sucess finding work any where. All I get is , (thank you for your interest in our company and we will keep your application on file). While thats all well and good, I am still not getting a pay check. Currently I have my fingers crossed for an adult day care which is something I really want because I have skills in that area, after all I have been a disabled scouting rep and personal care attendent, taking care of disabled and elderly for most of my life. So my fingers are crossed, should know something by monday. But that job lead was 1 in four years of being here? I'm lucky I have an understanding room mate.

Anyway more to what the title states. Now that I am in a state program called SRS, I have been enrolled in a class that helps you build self esteem and people skills that help you get out there. Something I despritely need. But as well as being in this class, I have a job coach whos either not available because shes out of town or has cancels appointments, but when she is there she is giving me job leads theres no possible way I can go to. Because I dont drive for one and would have to catch a bus at 5:45 am when it is still dark to go to the next county to wait for possible three or four hrs before my shift even starts. and there are only two busses that run there , one going to and one coming back.

Now regarding this class, I would think that most employers look at attendence and wether you are there on time and ready to work when you get there. Well this class teaches that. Just by showing up and participating every day shows that you are consistant and are willing to be there when expected. Am I right? When you complete the full eight weeks that shows that you see things through and do not quit when something else or easier or better comes along. (yes thats my opinion.) And yes it is the job of this program/class to give you the skills to do that. Personally I think it would look better to an employer that you see things to the end.

So now that I have spilled my thoughts of the day I look forward to comments or concerns or simply those out there who think i am totally nuts.

And thats why I have started my own business so I can market what I can do, what I enjoy doing, and what will bring in the money so I take pay bills and take priide in what I can do, instead of setting myself up to fail at jobs I know I cant.

My job coach the other day told me we have to get you working because I dont get paid til you are working and have been at a job a steady amount of time.

As for SSI which I have applied and was denyed because they say because I still have the use of one side of my body , I am employable, I say "Then find me a job I can do and wont get fired from because of my abilities or dis abilitioes!" So far I am seeing nothing. Thats why I am fighting so hard and started my own company. Yes I know I have said that already. I did that more for me to see then annoy you lol

And yes they get alot of slackers BUT IM NOT ONE OF THEM.
I am one of several thousand who like standing on their own feet and being a productive member of society.

Be well and talk to you all later ...